if you want to learn about Jesus, get a dog.

A few days ago, my puppy bit me. And I don't mean just nipped me a little. The sucker bit me so hard I bled. And I was shocked at what it taught me.

I could hear things rattling around in the bathroom and saw light beaming out of a crack in the door. I knew my puppy had weaseled her way in there somehow. Nothing surprises me with this dog anymore. She probably even turned the light on by herself. This is a puppy who obliterates armies of socks, boxes of tissues, and jumps puppy gates. She is the cutest 7 pound terror I've ever met.

I found her in the bathroom...mouth stuffed to the brim with tissues, q-tips, and your typical bathroom garbage finds. Delicious, right? Definitely not. And definitely not good for a small puppy to swallow (or anyone for that matter!) As soon as I walked in, she knew she was in trouble. She peered up at me with her huge brown eyes, and then ran. She went straight to the Lovesac (a real piece of furniture...not what you're thinking - www.lovesac.com - thought even if it were what you're thinking, I'm married now!). It's like her huge princess puppy bed. As I chased her and tried to pry her jaw open, I started to worry, thinking about all the stuff in the garbage that could hurt her.

Oh my gosh. I am so stupid. How could I have left the door open? I could have swore I shut it. How does she find her way in? What happens if she swallows a Q-tip and it get's stuck in her little puppy belly and won't come out? What if they have to do surgery on her little body? The vet would think I neglect her. Everyone in the waiting room would know what a horrible puppy mother I am. What if they told PITA? And they sued me for leaving the bathroom door open....

I was rattled out of my thoughts when I felt a quick and lasting burning sensation in my right index finger. She bit me. It felt worse than my tattoo. I let out a scream, and those jaws of life clamped harder. I lifted up Lilah and she let go. I was dripping blood.

And the little buzzard still had garbage in her mouth.

My husband heard me scream and ran into the living room. Since Survivor wasn't on, he knew I must have been yelling at Lilah and not the TV. He looked at her and yelled, "NO!" and made an attempt to take the rest of the garbage out of her mouth. As I was rinsing my finger in the sink and complaining that it was going to fall off, I heard Caleb yell. "SHE BIT ME!!" I knew this meant trouble.

Lilah would stay in her puppy crate the rest of the night. Caleb and I proceeded to whine like parents we see on sitcoms about how we feed her and play with her and take her on walks - and how does she repay us? By eating garbage and biting us when we try and protect her from what could hurt her. And then it hit me.

I looked at my husband with tears in my eyes and he calmly asked what was wrong. I looked at Lilah in her crate, sitting pretty with her head cocked to the side, not making a sound.

I do that to God all the time Caleb. He takes care of me, provides for me, gives me everything for my joy. And yet, in a moment, I will find something that my life deems more important and run to protect it. And when He tries to keep me from what will harm me, I bite His finger and make Him bleed.

I didn't enjoy seeing Lilah stuck in her puppy crate all night. I knew she'd rather be chewing on her bone, and I would have much rather played with her than watch her sit alone. But Lilah is just a puppy, and if I didn't punish her, she'd never learn that what she did was wrong.

If God never allowed me to experience the consequences of my actions, I would never learn. Now certainly, I was not going to let Lilah eat garbage and die because she doesn't have the mental capacity of a human. However, you do. And I do. We have discernment and a conscience...not to mention Scripture that holds all the secrets. And yet Scripture also tells us if we want our sin bad enough, we will be given over to it as to learn that even the sweetest of sins will not satisfy. The most innocent of sins...


It's not like I've killed anybody. I just wanted a good job so I could give my family a better life than I had. So what if I'm working 70 hours a week? I make most of my sons games. And my wife, she knows I love her. She makes me dinner all the time because she knows how hard I work. She even left a job she loved to take care of the kids full time so I could work my way up. I buy them everything they ask for. The only thing I'm guilty of is giving my family a good life.

Trust me. You're killing them. And yourself.

Maybe you don't have kids, and maybe you aren't married. But I bet you fall into this trap all the time. I know I do. It's almost too easy. Justifying our sin until we are knee deep in it, then blaming God for letting us go that far.

Maybe it's because He knows we know better. Or maybe He knew something worse would happen if He didn't allow our actions to teach us something the first time. Or maybe He is sick of watching you protect your garbage with all the might that my puppy did. Maybe He knows grace has to be taught, experienced. His love cannot merely be read about in a book.

Looking back on my short 22 years, I am now grateful that God gave me over to some of my garbage. I no longer think it's because He didn't love me, but rather because He did. I pray this becomes the case for you.

And if you want to learn about grace firsthand, buy a really, really, really cute puppy.